please know that because i am posting this, i am NOT in any way taking this lightly- as some of you know, sadie has given way to what we southerners call "fits"...and i am at a loss. i have tried every emotion with her (anger, being calm, ignoring, spanking, time-out) and analyzed every thing on the way up to the fit (tired, hungry, been around the boys too much, my moods) there seems to be no common denominator except she demands attention pretty much all the time and she may be giving it her best shot with these tantrums. i just don't know what to do when it happens. i feel helpless and ignorant and like a very bad parent.
i know this isn't healthy for any of us. i am crazy, sad and feeling left like i am not good at my purpose. i love her and am soooo crazy about her but lately she is just driving me crazy.
please pray for my parenting, my sanity and Sadie...
7 comments:
I wish I had some good advice! All I know is that every child will test us in some area at some point! It would be great if we had a magic solution for it, but unfortunately, we usually end up feeling like failures as parents! Niiice! I'll SURELY pray for you and Sadie...this too shall pass! ;o)
Don't know any of the circumstances--
Guess I don;t need to.
I WILL be thinking all my good thoughts for you tonight and sending all my positive energy your way.
Thomas J.
been there. done that. doing that. i can't say much b/c i'm smack in the middle of that but reagan's never really turned into fits as much as they are just crying episodes. i think holly's RIGHT ON. do the same thing EVERY TIME. find that "naughty chair" place. when she starts, say CALMLY and quietly, "sadie, this is your warning. if you do not stop now, you're going to go to..." if she doesn't stop immediately, take her there. NO EXCEPTIONS. make it a rule and be consistent. NO EXCUSES either - no matter how tired/hungry/cranky they are, they CANNOT act crazy. i tell reagan, "it's okay to cry but it is NOT okay to scream and act ugly." now, when he starts one of his crying episodes, he automatically turns and heads to his room. LOL i love you and am with you and am SO DOING THAT SAME STUFF RIGHT NOW. just easier to see it and help with someone else than it is to change it in your own house.
now you all tell ME how to make reagan NOT SO BLOOMING EMOTIONAL! i know. i know. change the fact that he has MY GENES!
I am in the same place with Duncan. Looks like age is the common denominator. One night last week I absolutely could not take one more second of his screaming, and we were driving down the road. We had just left Jason's office, and Duncan was mad about_____ something. Fill in the blank, so many things make him mad. Anyway, after screaming at him (ineffective) and spanking him while drving (also ineffective), I turned the car around and took him to Jason, who was at the theatre. I knew Jason would be mad, but I also knew if I took Duncan home, I'd hurt him. Really hurt him. Guess I have just exposed myself for the angry mother that I can be, but I wanted both of us to get past the fit unscathed, and at that moment I was so close to going over the edge. Sometimes I just want to drive far, far away...I haven't yet. I know what the others are saying is right - to be calm and consistent, but trying to maintain that is soooo hard.
love you-g
well we made it a whole day and a half without any problems until yesterday after the boys came home and we were in a mad hurry to get our costumes on and have sooo much fun...
so the common denominator seems to be hectic moments (how do you eliminate with our lifestyle?) coupled with her attention being divided among her brothers. when it's just me and her she's usually pretty great.
see she has riley's ability to be dramatic although his is always in self pity and gates strong will to not back down- AHHH! (or did those come from me and mk...) whatever the case i am feeling some relief.
thanks for all your comments. i did shut the door on her yesterday during her fit. she hated it.
good advice ;)
i am also glad to hear other people stuggle with this too. it seriously feels better knowing your not alone...
love to all
Maybe it is just four--
My Sam is the single most volitile, turbulent human being I have ever known--
He can go from zero to meltdown in 3.5 seconds.
How do any of us survive four?
hey - mom ALWAYS said our worst times (hers included) were when we were hurrying or trying to do too much. don't we all do BOTH those things all the time?
Post a Comment