my latest discovery is that i am thinking i can be a better person by simply being more simple.i think...
oh my word, i can hardly admit this but...mom...has always said, "slow down gena", and bigger still the Lord has always said "be still gena, know i have you"
and still i keep going like the energizer bunny, except for this week...nothing.
everyday its been get up,
shave my legs (maybe),
put on a hat
and go sit by my in-laws pool.
and be still.
and swim some because my kids make fun of me and gracious it's 100 degrees...
i have so much gain from this stillness. ..
-my new close friend, my sister in-law in which we have sadly never taken this much quality time together.
-my kids are great swimmers and they are digging their cousins. that's good for the fam.
-i am more at peace than i have been in soooo long. i am not sure that's from the pool or the stillness. i am betting the stillness. God is good. i am not worthy.
-lastly, lets not forget my vanity...my tan. it's not much seeing as i am freckely and all but there is sadly some peace coming from it. ahh, still working on that.
i will soooo miss my stillness.
just tonight we had orientation and i see i have my work cut out for me. here we go...
i do better when i have more to do...i have always worked that way.
i have accomplished little in my stillness but i have gotten closer to God than i have been in some time.
- PrIcEleSs...now what to do?
Pull-up the bootstraps and get moving and be the room mom, student minister, mother of 3 i chose to be or StoP................and sit and think and pray and consider this lifestyle one more time...
i need wisdom.
seriously.
what are your opinions on this picking back up the pace?
healthy? unhealthy?
consider these verses before you decide:
- The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." Ex. 14:14
- Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways. Ps. 37:7a
- James 3:1...Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.
James 2:18But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds."
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do. 20You foolish man, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless?
be still,
be better at what you do,
be still,
do something worthwhile...show your faith...ahhhh!
i am not confused. i am needing balance.
i am just at a loss where that balance is supposed to stay for me.
(and amy's, i can't get that crazy im to work, so you will know. maybe it has something to do with all this...?)
2 comments:
My thoughts exactly. But since you asked. There is a difference between "resting" (a.k.a. sitting down and relax a little like you did at the pool or even being lazy like some of us are at times) and "being at rest."
I know you get tired of hearing me say it but GET OUT YOUR PENCIL AND READ CAPTIVATING!
It's something I'm really working on. I tend to be spastic almost. Running around trying to get stuff done, stressing out because the room I just cleaned now has Star Wars figures spread out across the floor, etc. John and Stasi Eldredge were speaking to me when they mentioned Zeph. 3:17 ("He will quiet you with his love.) and when they wrote, "A woman of true beauty is a woman who in the depths of her soul is at rest, trusting God because she has come to know him to be worth of her trust. She exudes a sense of calm, a sense of rest, and invites those around her to rest as well."
Can you picture that? Busy physically but resting spiritually or emotionally.
Also, they remind us that "Mary dropped everything and sat at his feet."
"We're all living in the shadow of that infamous icon, "The Proverbs 31 Woman," whose life is so busy I wonder when does she have time for friendships, for taking walks, or reading good books? Her light never goes out at night? When DOES she have time for sex?...The message [we send to ourselves] is TRY HARDER...Whatever it means to bear God's image [though], you do so AS A WOMAN."
That's a little broken up but you get the point. We have a lot to live up to. I do NOT know where the line is but I know I'm trying to learn to "set about my work vigorously" and put my heart at rest simultaneously.
Does that make sense at all? It's early.
READ THE BOOK!
yes, perfect sense. and i want to be that. i believe that the whole emotional and spiritual resting thing is what i am figuring out- and the physical rest follows that because i see that i need it (pool time, etc.)
somehow thru all this "rest" i have managed to keep the laundry, kitchen and bathrooms clean and beds made. it doesn't hassle me. i think that is part of the blessing of true rest.
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